Rock of Ages

Released: 2012
Musical
Director: Adam Shankman
Starring: Julianne Hough, Diego Boneta, Tom Cruise
Running Time: 123 agonizing minutes
Rated: PG-13

The breakdown:  Based on the play of the same name, this story is about a young mid-west girl that travels to Los Angeles to become a music star.

This movie has gone down in history for me.  Within the first two minutes, I let out my first groan of agony.  I don't think any movie has ever made me do that this early on, and it just got worse from there.
I can only assume that anyone who was anyone knew this stank before they finished reading the script and promptly turned it down.  The only person who could actually sing well in it, was the professional singer, Mary J. Blige.  
Tom Cruise didn't suck at singing, but I wouldn't pay to hear him do it, since I can't stand him in the first place.
Julianne Hough may be a great dancer, but that's where her talents end.  She should stop trying to act, and REALLY PLEASE stop singing.  It was awful!
And seeing Russel Brand and Alec Baldwin sing and fall in love with each other, uck, yuck, vomit.

Oh, yeah, the plot.
Hough plays a young impressionable innocent girl from Oklahoma who goes to L.A. to make it as a singer.  She ends up as a waitress in a bar, and then a strip club.  I think she's also supposed to be a stripper at some point, but they make that ambiguous so you're really not sure.  She meets a guy who works at the first bar she waitresses at and he's a singer too!  Big surprise, he asks her out.  Blah, blah, blah, it's too boring, overdone with superficial and stereotyped characters to give a crap about to talk about the rest of the plot.

PLEASE DON'T WATCH THIS.
1 out of 5 for some well choreographed strip pole dancing.